The most disrespected person in America is the black woman. The most unprotected person in America is the black woman. The most neglected person in America is the black woman. Malcolm X
What Do Black Women Want?
What Does Black African American, Caribbean Women Want?
From the world, what She wants is to be equally valued, respected, treated fairly, as everything human came out of Her and Returns to Her, though the world steals from Her, carbon copy Her, without credit; with no shame. Like slavery days, when it was okay to beat Her, vilify Her, AND allow Her to feed your child from Her breast…which tells me, deep down, you know Her true worth..as the following quote says..
The soul has no secret that the behaviour does not reveal. Lao Tzu
Deep in your soul, you know; deep in the world’s soul, it knows…
You can’t keep a Good Woman down.
From Her white Sistreens, especially in the world of work, What the Black Woman Wants from you is for you to stop taking Her assertiveness and Her fight against injustice, so personally!
When She is targeted and gets caught up in it-in the isms & kisms, stop calling that aggressive! Own that aggression that the hand of privilege has raised you up on; then come again, corrected, then maybe we can become more united and together truly work towards the dismantlement of women hating patriarchy.
And from the Brothers, don’t get it twisted, before all this came to be, We existed, as One, in a Garden called Bliss, made in Love’s Image; joined together as Foundation of Ancient Civilisation & Beyond. Founding Mothers & Fathers. As it was in the beginning, so shall it be Above. So embrace Her, don’t chase Her away, She’s your complimentary and needs you in all kinds of ways, as your struggle mirrors hers & is one of the same.
If you hate on Her and deliberately choose as your pride Other than Her, know that (unconsciously) you are throwing shade and hating on yourself and on your race.
Choose another if you wish, just don’t solely base that decision on wanting to get away with shit, by playing “guilt trip,” and placing the Other on it…I will leave it there. As Bob Marley said, “If the cap fits, wear it;” if it don’t, there won’t be no need for defensiveness.
And to Us Sisters, please feel allowed to lay down your arms, at necessary times, and do away with completely living out the myth of the strong black woman. That you most definitely are, but you are also very human. So stop acting as if you can do it all by yourself and don’t need no one else, least of all a man. That talk is just hurt and disappointment. Allow yourself to be vulnerable, I promise you, all hell won’t break loose. I know being vulnerable is difficult to do in a world where you are being constantly assaulted, overlooked and abused. But for wellbeing sake you simply have to. You’re tired. Tired makes us miserable.
And in regards to being parents, let’s all the more raise our boys to be grown men, as in our love for him and how mistreated He too is in this world, we can unconsciously overcompensate, getting in the way of his growth, treating Him as eternal little boy. And as young men and grown men, when they fall, and/or the world knocks them down, don’t rush to go pick them; help them to Rise Up themselves. Give them the measuring stick of a King. Help them to experience that kind of self-fulfilling prophecy.
And for the Girl Child, don’t weigh her down so early in caregiving responsibility, let her have that room to breathe, to be, to please herself. Teach her self-care by modelling that behaviour yourself: that’s how children learn, not by what you say and don’t do. Equally as important, teach her how to make and keep boundaries. By doing so you will save her from many a broken heart later on and keep her safe from perverts who prowl around childhoods.
As the following quote says about the value of boundaries..
Boundaries are the distance at which I can love you and me simultaneously.
I will leave the topic of hair here (smiles).
This subject is obviously very emotive for me as a Black Woman of African Caribbean Heritage..as a voice still unheard and unreckoned with across the diasporas; relegated to the bottom of many a pile. But I smile, cos, you see, given a choice, I would still come back into this world as me, as there is a certain wisdom that comes from being in that bottom of the pile position; to quote Harriet Lerner,
In relationships between dominant and subordinate groups, the subordinate group members always possess a far greater understanding of the dominant group members and their culture than vice versa.
I do not claim to speak for all Black Women. I speak from my experience of being one. And I speak from all the Black Women who have peopled my world, past and present. I write this piece to provide some clarity to those truly interested in knowing What Black Women Wants. This question has already been mused generically based primarily on White European Women wants & needs, but as you can see, as sisters, the world has made our needs and wants very different.
I have also created this piece as tribute, a tribute I believe Black women are incredibly worthy and deserving of. So when inspiration struck this week during my morning jog, I quickly had to put pen to page and overarchingly say,
You BLack Woman Are Beautiful, Original, Phenomenal..
You, We deserve to be here! Here & equally cherished, protected, loved, revered!
You have been Instrumental in the making of this world!!
Life Sees You and Knows Your Intrinsic Value. I say that again,
Life Sees You and Knows Your Intrinsic Value.
My Sister, Mother of all mothers,
I SALUTE YOU!!!
Peace & Love,